I often find myself humming Baptist hymns (think Old Rugged Cross) or even quoting Scripture to myself in the mornings during my personal introspection time. Sometimes I go as far as creating an entire sermon in my head that would make even John Hagee enthralled.
None of this would sound too crazy if I was a Christian. But, the truth of the matter is, I’m not. I was born and raised in Texas in a very Fundamentalist Evangelical Baptist family and largely home-schooled all the way up to 8th grade. Oh, the indoctrination!
My father is currently a Pastor of a country Baptist Church in rural Texas where he believes the only true Word of God is the King James version Bible. This is something I professed to believe at a very young age as well.
In fact, many folks may not know that I too was once a preacher! I started preaching at the ripe young age of 14. I was invited to preach to several churches around San Antonio and surrounding rural towns as the prodigy preacher boy. I even preached at a tent revival! So what happened?
I ended up leaving the Faith at the age of 17 when I realized who I truly was and came out of the closet. That was hands down the hardest time in my life! The amount of people coming to my house to pray over me and the others who completely shunned me was overwhelming.
It was at age 17 that I started on a journey of discovering the many other world religions that I had previously known nothing about. I began to be fascinated by Eastern Religion in addition to the great philosophers such as Albert Camus and Schopenhauer.
Shaking a Faith that you were completely indoctrinated in as a child is extremely difficult and does not happen overnight. I share this story because I am certain there are others out there just like me. I’ll probably always consider myself a “Recovering Fundamentalist”.